Two posts in two successive days, am neverthless thrilled about it (it doesnt take too much for me to get thrilled), my previous post was not entirely original, it was an inspired write up(partly original), It didnt give me too much of a creative satisfaction (well even if its a write up that does not make sense and if its yours, it still feels good), so I actually thought I had to do something about it, and the topic had to be something that I could write about anytime, and every blog that I checked had its take on this, well here's my take .......
Arranged Or Love...
Is the most oft asked question - when you say you are going to attend a wedding, your friend is getting married, your friends sister is getting
married, or some random person whom you once gossiped about is getting married, and then you could be getting married.. and then the never ending debate of which one works better.. there is nothing like an ideal marriage, just like an ideal spouse, its all about making it work, about sacrifices or atleast so have I heard from people..
Well take most instances of people who are in love, ask them how did they decide that the person was the right one, 90 out of 100 will tell you "INSTINCT" , ask people who had to decide over a cup of coffee or over
just a 5 minute conversation in this whole saga of arranged marriage,
most of them would still say "INSTINCT"
Arranged Or Love...
Is the most oft asked question - when you say you are going to attend a wedding, your friend is getting married, your friends sister is getting
married, or some random person whom you once gossiped about is getting married, and then you could be getting married.. and then the never ending debate of which one works better.. there is nothing like an ideal marriage, just like an ideal spouse, its all about making it work, about sacrifices or atleast so have I heard from people..
Well take most instances of people who are in love, ask them how did they decide that the person was the right one, 90 out of 100 will tell you "INSTINCT" , ask people who had to decide over a cup of coffee or over
just a 5 minute conversation in this whole saga of arranged marriage,
most of them would still say "INSTINCT"
( am not talking about forced marriages here, thats a different story altogether).
Sanjay and Zarine Khan decided they were made for each other, the very first day they met over a casual stroll on the beach ( they were 19 and
14 at that time), Anil Ambani and Tina Munim hadnt seen or spoken to each other for over two years after they decided to part ways, before Anil decided to break the silence and they got married, they say things could have gone so many ways in these two years but they are just destined to get together.
Both these marriages have worked or so have many others, Jackie Shroff first saw his wife in a Video library and then decided she was the one for him or is this one better, hrithik saw Susanne khan at his sisters engagement party and told his friend that "that girl" was gonna be his, he even had no clue who she was, what happened after that is well known to the whole world.
( Courtesy: Rendezvous with Simi Garewal and my ever favorite magazine FILMFARE).
And we all know of the countless arranged marriages which have been success stories, for atleast till a little while ago, LOVE marriages were considered a crime in the soceity. Times have changed or atleast have started to change, people have become more receptive to the idea, though they may not entirely approve of it. Just like most of us who are just in love, with the idea of being in love, than being in love, parents are beginning to see reason in the choice of their children. I still know many of our generation who very conciously avoid getting into a relationship for fear of upsetting their parents and the
same holds good for parents who still believe that they know best
when it comes to choosing a life partner for their children. Either ways,
it is the rest of a lifetime that we are talking about,
Sanjay and Zarine Khan decided they were made for each other, the very first day they met over a casual stroll on the beach ( they were 19 and
14 at that time), Anil Ambani and Tina Munim hadnt seen or spoken to each other for over two years after they decided to part ways, before Anil decided to break the silence and they got married, they say things could have gone so many ways in these two years but they are just destined to get together.
Both these marriages have worked or so have many others, Jackie Shroff first saw his wife in a Video library and then decided she was the one for him or is this one better, hrithik saw Susanne khan at his sisters engagement party and told his friend that "that girl" was gonna be his, he even had no clue who she was, what happened after that is well known to the whole world.
( Courtesy: Rendezvous with Simi Garewal and my ever favorite magazine FILMFARE).
And we all know of the countless arranged marriages which have been success stories, for atleast till a little while ago, LOVE marriages were considered a crime in the soceity. Times have changed or atleast have started to change, people have become more receptive to the idea, though they may not entirely approve of it. Just like most of us who are just in love, with the idea of being in love, than being in love, parents are beginning to see reason in the choice of their children. I still know many of our generation who very conciously avoid getting into a relationship for fear of upsetting their parents and the
same holds good for parents who still believe that they know best
when it comes to choosing a life partner for their children. Either ways,
it is the rest of a lifetime that we are talking about,
for holy matrimony is considered a bonding for a lifetime and everyone tries hard to make it work atleast in our Soceity.
There is always a flip side to this, not all arranged marriages are made in heaven, not all love marriages are rosy.. people who have had an
arranged marriage may realise they are just two different people and
There is always a flip side to this, not all arranged marriages are made in heaven, not all love marriages are rosy.. people who have had an
arranged marriage may realise they are just two different people and
cannot be compatible, then in love marriage, most often people
try to change the very basic characteristic in a person that they
fell in love with, then the blame game starts, who was responsible
for getting the match fixed, atleast in case of a love marriage,
you had made your choice, you live and you learn, but in the case of an arranged marriage, its just the case that your parents might be
supportive.. and then not to forget arranged marriages are the only
option for poor souls who got dumped, who were not able to impress
anybody or that they just did not meet the right person, but there is always someone for everyone in an arranged marriage.
They say "All relationships come with an expiry date, just that in most cases, the man or woman will expire... "
"In arranged marriages DESTINY chooses you, In love marriages you choose your DESTINY "....
either ways its destiny...... :):)
( I would like to say that I came up with this quote but recently I heard some one saying the same thing on TV, nobody would now believe if I say it was my
original quote)
"Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are
half chance. So are everybody else's." - Baz Luhrmann (Wear Sunscreen)
"In arranged marriages DESTINY chooses you, In love marriages you choose your DESTINY "....
either ways its destiny...... :):)
( I would like to say that I came up with this quote but recently I heard some one saying the same thing on TV, nobody would now believe if I say it was my
original quote)
"Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are
half chance. So are everybody else's." - Baz Luhrmann (Wear Sunscreen)
2 comments:
hmmm... tat reminded me of the endless n numerous discussions v have had abt this topic:):). but i guess anytime i would settle in for love marriages, u know why:-)
Make a sense (;))
I would really like to ask a question, the very basis for marriages...
if Trivial reasons form the basis for marriages, the same reason becomes the basis for separation.
"I like some flavor of ice-cream, you like the same... get married..". If someday if one of them does not like the same flavor, then there is a rift. In my view, one should try to look beyond, long term goals for getting married. If the goal of the both parties is same, righteousness (Dharma) then, i think there is little reason for them to get separated. Both the parties should try to understand that
there is no one in this world without limitations. This should be borne in mind and the parities can caringly understand each other. For this to happen, self-introspection is necessary. Just sit aside calmly and try to understand the situation. In the present world, very less people introspect. There is a sudden spurt of negative emotions which cause pain to other. These can be carefully handled if people begin to study themselves.
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